Dolls
by PercyJacksonTheAwesome
Summary: "They all have some whom they love; someone who they're connected to like no other. But they're too hardened; too protected to express that love to each other. So they express it in dolls." Look at the picture for visualization & inspiration. Contains Clintasha, Science Bros friendship, Steve/Phil friendship, and Thorki brotherly love. ONESHOT WEEK #2


**ONESHOT WEEK #2**

**A/N: Hey guys! Sorry it's so late at night; I've been working on this all day. And sorry for the length but I'm extremely proud of myself. This has been in the works for like a month.**

**And thanks for participation in yesterday's puzzle! Answer today's puzzle correctly and I'll give you a clue to Saturday's surprise!**

**~PJA**

**PUZZLE #2: ****There's an insect, and the first part of its name is the name of another insect. What is the name of the insect?**

Dolls

They all have someone they love; someone they're connected to like nobody else.

But, being who they are, they're too hardened, too protective of themselves, and too shut off to share the love with one another. So they express the love in a different way.

They have dolls.

The dolls are not hard and plastic, like a Barbie doll a pigtailed six-year-old plays with on a Sunday. They are more soft, clothy, stuffed, like a Raggedy Ann doll your mother played with when she was young. Those are easier to cuddle with, easier to hug, easier to love.

* * *

Bruce Banner has a Tony Stark doll. But not exactly Tony - an Iron Man doll. They sell Iron Man dolls at just about every toy store he's ever seen. He sees the children as they scramble to pick up the soft, cuddly enigma of their hero. Bruce always smiles when he sees that. But when he looks at Iron Man, he sees the man inside - Tony. That's the man he knows. Iron Man is a façade Tony puts up, to block everyone out when he goes out to be the hero. Everyone sees Iron Man; not Tony. Except for Bruce. He knows Tony.

Tony may be a rich pain in the ass, but Tony is smart, witty, and he understands Bruce. Tony knows what it's like to have something foreign in his body. He knows what it's like to want to control himself, and to use science as an outlet. Tony is the only one smart enough to work with Bruce, to do experiments and research, to work to help mankind. Bruce always feels happy after working in the lab, despite everyone's thought that he comes out feeling extremely flustered. Everyone wonders how he deals with Tony (well, except for Pepper, bless her soul). In reality, it isn't that hard. You just pay no mind to that smart-ass mouth of his, and he's actually a great person to work with. He has a brilliant mind.

So Bruce has a Tony - or, Iron Man - doll. The doll is actually a good representation of the Iron Man suit, although it's missing some of the intricate detail on the suit. One of the things Bruce wishes he could do is lift up the little helmet on the doll's head and see Tony's face underneath. Because in reality, Iron Man isn't just Iron Man. On the inside he's Tony, and that's how it will always be.

So when Bruce is awake at night, when he's feeling alone, or distanced, or insecure about himself, he reaches over, grabs the Tony doll, and hugs it close. With the doll wrapped in his arms, he can feel that Tony is close, that everything will be alright, and he is comforted.

And even when he finally drifts off to sleep, and the doll is released from a tight clutch, and is loosely held by a delicate man, Tony's presence still lingers. He was never actually there, but he was always there in spirit, which is enough for a sleeping Bruce.

* * *

Tony Stark has a Bruce Banner doll. And to his great delight, it's a Hulk doll. When Tony wanders past a Toys R Us, he sometimes sees a display of Avengers toys, and he smiles when he sees the little boys scramble for the Hulk dolls, mock-roaring, and yelling that it's not a doll, it's a manly action figure! Tony knows how everyone sees the Hulk. People see the Hulk in two ways. Some people see him as an utterly awesome hero, with brute strength enough to rip up the Empire State Building. People love that he uses his strength and almost indestructibility for good. It makes him look like a hero. But some people see the Hulk as a monster. Yes, the Hulk is a rage monster. And when you push him the wrong way, Hulk will do nothing but destroy. It's the people that anger the Hulk who see him as a monster.

But Tony doesn't see the Hulk as a hero, or a monster. Tony sees the Hulk as the man underneath - Bruce. Tony had seen the Hulk before he had ever met Bruce, and he was in complete awe of the utter awesomeness of the Hulk. But as time went on, and Tony met the man behind the rage, he realized that he'd come to know and like Bruce better.

For one, Bruce tolerates him. Bruce will listen to just about anything Tony throws at him, smart or smart-ass, and will toss in a comment when needed. Tony appreciates that. Most people don't listen. Some don't even stay in the room, and some will slap him before he can speak. Bruce, Pepper, Rhodey, and Happy are the only ones who will really listen. But Bruce is the only one smart enough for Tony to have an intelligent conversation with. Before Bruce came around, Tony would go into his lab and work alone, sometimes for as long as two days straight. But when Bruce came into his life, Tony found the joy of working with someone in the lab. It was a new experience, having someone of equal intellect to be able to bounce ideas off of and help contribute to whatever they were working on. Tony thoroughly enjoyed it. When Bruce came along, Tony found renewed purpose. He helped a man realize that having a monster inside him could be a good thing. And that man helped him realize that helping people could be a truly rewarding experience.

So Tony has a Bruce - no, a Hulk - doll. The size isn't relative - the doll is the same size as all the other dolls - and it's harder to see all the muscles, but other than that it's a pretty good representation of the Hulk. The shade of green is exactly right, the face and hair are actually pretty accurate, and it even has the purple tattered pants. Tony wishes the doll had the ability to morph down to the enigma of the tiny Bruce, but it can't. It's just a Hulk doll. But Tony will always see the Hulk as the man inside - Bruce.

So when Tony is lying awake at night, terrified that the arc reactor will somehow fail him, or he has horrifying memories from those cold, awful nights in Afghanistan, or he's feeling lonely, like he did all those years as a kid, he snatches the Hulk doll from his nightstand, and he hugs it close. With the doll, he is always reminded of the fateful day when the Hulk saved him from a certain death by falling, and then proceeded to shock him into consciousness. When Tony hugs the doll close, he feels like he not only has the protection of the Hulk, but the companionship of Bruce. When he clutches the enigma of Bruce close to his arc reactor, close to his heart, he can feel like Bruce is actually there. And that's enough to comfort even the self-obsessed Iron Man.

And when Tony plunges into a deep, sometimes alcohol-induced sleep, and one of his arms lolls off the side of the bed, leaving the doll clutched in one arm on the top of his chest, near the blue glow, Bruce's presence is still there. It never left, even if Tony's spirit is absorbed by the alcohol. Even Iron Man needs some protection in his most vulnerable of states, and that's exactly what Bruce is there for.

* * *

Natasha Romanoff has a Clint Barton doll. To be perfectly honest, the doll was extremely hard to find. Whenever Natasha passes by one of the toy stores around the corner, the Avengers toy display of intimidating size always catches her eye. Topping the mountain are always the Iron Man toys, followed by Captain America, the Hulk, and then Thor. There are seldom toys of her, which she doesn't mind, but there are absolutely never any of Hawkeye, which she does mind. Clint is just as important as the rest of them, and why people neglect to recognize him and put his face on an action figure eludes Natasha. She knows Clint would love to have an action figure of himself.

Most people will look at Hawkeye and see the "expendable member of the Avengers," or just see "the archer." People don't really care about him. True, the public didn't know of his existence before the New York incident. People have seen Iron Man, Captain America, and possibly the Hulk for years, marveling over how amazing they are. Thor, however, didn't come into the mix until extremely recent times, and the only theory Natasha can come up with for the explanation of his instant popularity would be the Norse mythology legends. However, that still doesn't give people a right to overlook Clint Barton. His costume might not be as flashy as the Iron Man suit or as spangly as Captain America's, but he is just as important as the rest of the team. He helped to save the world; they couldn't have done it without him. At least, Natasha knows she couldn't have. People may not see Hawkeye as more than just someone who's just there, but Natasha sees him as the man behind his façade: Clint Barton. Hawkeye is just an alias, no matter how accurate. The face he puts on when he goes out to do a job. Clint goes so much deeper.

He is more than just a partner to her. Natasha has known Clint for countless years, and she wouldn't trade that for anything; even the chance to wipe her ledger clean. Clint accepted her when no one else would. He gave her a chance. And although at the beginning his sarcasm, wittiness, and just his general air got on her nerves, now it's become a part of everyday life. If she doesn't hear Clint's voice sometime during the day, she knows something is not dreadfully wrong. She is not only terrified of the fact that something might have happened to him, but she hates not having him by her side. She can't stand not being with him. When she is by his side, she finally feels like she belongs.

She is in love with Clint Barton. The deepest sort of love a person can ever be in. When she is with him, she doesn't have to put up an act. She can just be her. And she loves that he accepts her with no question. She loves everything about him. She loves his laugh, his wit, his sharp mind, his kind, gentle, protective nature. She loves him. She loves all of him, unconditionally.

So Natasha has a Clint Barton doll. Or, actually, a Hawkeye doll. A Clint doll would be donned in blue jeans and a red t-shirt or gray hoodie. This doll is dressed in the Hawkeye uniform. And to be perfectly honest, it was a pain in the butt to find. She had to go to fifteen different stores before she found anything Hawkeye. And even then, it took eternity to look through that store and find the perfect doll. The cashier gave her a funny look when she checked out, but Natasha didn't care. No one understands. It frustrates her that no one appreciates Clint like she does. So when it's at this point, she doesn't care that the cashier is watching her as she leaves the store clutching the doll in her arms. When she arrives home, she carefully places the doll in the nightstand by her bed. Whoever made this doll did a pretty damn good job, at least. It's extremely detailed, so much that it surprises Natasha. The vest is so accurate and intricate. The sunglasses over his eyes don't slide off, which disappoints her. She loves Clint's eyes - a cool shade of blue-gray. There is even a small bow strapped to his back, though there are no arrows. But what makes Natasha really smile is looking at the hair - it looks so much like Clint that it's not even funny.

So when Natasha is lying awake at three in the morning, when the horrid memories of the Red Room and her bitter past come back to haunt her, and when she begins to panic, instead of running to find Clint, she grabs the Clint doll from her bedside table and hugs it tight, imagining it to be Clint, letting it comfort her.

And when she finally drifts off to sleep, and the doll rests in its place tucked under her hand right by her side, Clint's presence remains with her. He was always there in spirit. When Clint can't be there for her, his spirit is with her, in the doll. It is enough to soothe the cold-blooded assassin.

* * *

Clint Barton has a Natasha Romanoff doll. He isn't even sure where he got it, but he doesn't care. He knows Nat would throw it out if she knew he had it, or possibly burn it. She doesn't like it that they're selling dolls of her – she thinks she's a bad example for kids. Clint begs to differ. Whenever he sees a Black Widow toy at the toy stores he passes, he smiles, knowing what Nat's reaction would be. She would turn away in disgust, trying not to lash out and burn it all.

She thinks she's a bad public image. In truth, the public barely notices her next to Iron Man and Captain America and the Hulk and Thor. They notice her more than they do him, but only because she is the only female Avenger. In truth, she is a great role model for little girls – headstrong, fearless, and brave. Right up there with the boys. Not being a pathetic little damsel in distress. Actually doing something. She's actually significant. He feels insignificant next to the rest of them, though Nat always tells him he is important. However, even with all these people who look to her as a role model, there are some people who only see her as a sex symbol. Most of the people in this second group consist of young men, though those are not all. There are some people who look at her and just see her body, and dismiss her of having anything else of worth. Clint always wants to punch those people in the nose. Sure, her body is what they use to their advantage on S.H.I.E.L.D. missions, but whenever a man (young or old) gives her that look, Clint always gets a clenched, angry feeling in his gut. Natasha is so much more than what they can see.

Natasha is more than just his partner. Natasha will actually put up with him. The only other person who does that is Coulson, and occasionally Fury or the Avengers, though never to the extent of Nat. Nat is different. She understands him; nobody else does. Nobody else has tried. She managed to get under his thick skin, though he suspects that might have something to do with the fact that he managed to get under hers. But it's not only that. When Natasha is near him, he feels that he can be his ridiculous self, and no one will care. She won't judge him…too harshly. He wants to protect her, though she hardly needs protecting. He doesn't like it when Natasha isn't by his side. The fact that she could be in trouble isn't what bothers him. It's the fact that she isn't there – when Natasha isn't there, he feels like half of him is gone.

He is in love with Natasha Romanoff. When she isn't there, he aches for her. All he wants is her. Not just her body, but her everything. He wants to hear her snarky banters against his smart-ass-ness every morning. He wants to know that she can still kick his ass in a fight. He wants to know that he can sneak up behind her and embrace her with a kiss; one full of passion, one of love. He wants to be able to love her with all of his heart. And he wants to know that she loves him too.

So Clint Barton has a Natasha Romanoff doll. No, a Black Widow doll. There is a distinct difference between the two. The Black Widow doll is the emotionless, ruthless mask she puts on when she puts on her suit. Natasha is something completely different altogether. The doll, however, is the Black Widow. It's strapped in her skintight black suit, and has fiery red hair flowing from the top of her head. Clint will sometimes stroke that hair just as he does Natasha's.

So when Clint is lying awake at night, kept up with nightmares of being sucked back into Loki's control, unable to control himself from hurting Natasha, he will snatch up his doll from under the bed and hug it tight, as he would Natasha, since he's too afraid to actually wake up Natasha, though she probably is awake. He acts like it is Natasha he's holding, and lets the thought comfort him.

And once he's finally konked out, and the doll slips to his side, as if he's holding her around the shoulder, Natasha's presence is still there. It's what's keeps Clint going. Even though she's not actually there, he knows that she will always be there for him.

* * *

Steve Rogers has a Phil Coulson doll. And that's all it is. Just Phil. Steve didn't find the doll in a store. Oh no; Steve made the doll himself. It took three weeks, two sewing classes, and endless amounts of fabric and thread, but he made it with his own hands. And truthfully, Steve is very proud of his work. This is the only thing he's done in a long time that was just for…well, him. Everything else he does is for the good of the people. The doll is just for his pleasure.

When people look at Agent Phil Coulson, they see the cool, calm, collected man who seems to know everything about everything, and knows exactly what to do; always. The man has an emotionless wall; the job always comes first. That's what makes him a reliable agent. One of the best agents S.H.I.E.L.D. has ever had.

But Steve is one of the few people able to see past Phil's wall. Being Captain America, Phil's idol, means that Agent Phil Coulson will break down into an utter fanboy in the presence of him. Phil's inner fanboy takes over when he's near Steve, and his excitement takes over. Steve knows that Phil opens up much more than he wants to when he's near Steve. And though Phil sometimes only sees Steve as Captain America, the first Avenger, Steve slowly tries to make Phil see him as just Steve Rogers, the kid from Brooklyn.

And over the course of his time knowing Phil, Steve comes to love the agent like family. Eventually they become acquaintances, and then friends, though he knows Phil is still itching to ask him to sign his Captain America trading cards.

But when Phil dies, Steve's heart breaks. And when Fury throws the cards down on the table, covered in his blood…it takes every bit of Steve's willpower not to break down. This man, with whom Steve has become bonded to, who had admired and looked up to Steve ever since he could walk, is dead. He's gone, and he's not coming back. Although, Steve thought he was dead once, when he wasn't, he knows that it's different this time. He can feel it in his bones. Phil, their dear friend, isn't coming back.

So Steve Rogers has an Agent Phil Coulson doll. He has it to remind him of Phil. The doll looks just like Phil. It has his sleek haircut, crisp suit, and shiny Italian shoes. All dressed up, just like him. When he looks at it, he remembers Phil exactly as he was. He remembers all the times he had with Phil. When he looks at the doll, he remembers Phil. He will always remember Phil. He will never forget.

And when Steve is awake at night, scared that he'll plunge into the ice and not wake up, he'll take the fragile doll from its perch and rest it on the bed with him. It brings him comfort. Sometimes, if he's extremely drowsy, it's like Phil is actually there.

And when he plunges into sleep, his arms crossed behind his head and the doll resting on his chest, Phil's presence is still there. Phil never left. Phil will always be there, in their hearts. In fact, Phil's presence there is so strong, so real, it's almost as if he's actually there. It's as if there's a large, man-sized shadow lurking in the corner of the room.

* * *

Agent Phil Coulson has a Captain America doll. In fact, he has many Captain America dolls. But there is one that is his favorite. His favorite is a soft, fabric doll that he's had since he was eleven. The doll is well-loved, but taken care of. Phil has found a special cleaning kit, and once a week he will give it a cleaning to keep it nice and fresh-looking. Phil always takes very special care of his Captain America memorabilia.

To the world, Captain America is the world's first superhero. He is the beacon of goodness and heroism, and the world always appreciates a man like him. Phil was one of those people. He looked up to Captain America like a role model. He was everything he wanted to be. It was Phil's dream to meet Captain America, and at times he wanted to _be_ Captain America. He was Captain America for almost every Halloween as a kid, and spent most of his free time collecting Captain America collectables.

But when word came out at S.H.I.E.L.D. that Captain America himself had been found in the ice and was being brought back, Phil couldn't contain himself. He would finally get to meet his hero! Excitement was bubbling over in the normally emotionless agent. People at HQ wondered what was wrong with him. But when the day came when he actually saw the Captain, face to face...he couldn't contain himself. He told himself that he would remain calm, but that didn't happen. His inner fanboy took control, and he revealed a lot more than he'd wanted to, but Steve took it well. He wasn't freaked out like Phil had expected him to be. In fact, he wanted to be friends. Friends with Captain America! It was everything Phil had ever wanted in life. And though eventually he became comfortable in Steve's presence, he was always itching to ask Steve to sign his trading cards.

So Phil Coulson has a Steve Rogers doll. He comes to think of it as Steve, even though it is a Captain America doll. The two are one in the same. The doll that has taken its place in Phil's heart as his favorite is only slightly faded, but it looks just like Captain America's original uniform, helmet and all. Sometimes Phil wishes it was the outfit he had design input to, but he can't complain. This is the doll he's loved since childhood.

And when Phil is kept awake at night, haunted by memories of compromised missions, he hugs the doll tighter and immediately feels better. It always brings a small smile to his face when he thinks of Captain America; his hero.

And when Phil is finally asleep, and the doll is loosely held in two hands on his chest, Captain America is there. He is always there, in spirit. When Phil sleeps, the spirit of Captain America is there, protecting Phil, keeping him safe.

* * *

Loki Laufeyson has a Thor doll. He stole it from one of the mortal toy shops in New York City. He wouldn't dare tell Thor he had it. There are many things he doesn't tell his brother, and this is up there in the top ten things to never tell him under any circumstances.

The mortals, they think Thor and the rest of the group of "heroes" known as the Avengers are so amazing. In truth, they are a pathetic band of misfits trying to save the world. Loki could have taken them out easily, if he'd just had a better army. The Chitauri weren't exactly top-notch soldiers. Brutal, yes, but coordinated and smart? Not exactly. The Avengers weren't all that. He could point out ten flaws in every single one of them. And the good part? None of them knew him. None of them knew his weaknesses; what made him tick. None of them...except for Thor.

How did Loki feel towards his brother? Well, that was a bit complicated. As a child, Loki both looked up to and envied his brother. He was the favored son; always in the spotlight. Everyone always overlooked Loki. Everyone, however, except for Thor. Thor loved Loki, and always tried to include him and play with him. This was all fun and games until he learned of his true heritage. Everything went downhill from there. Loki hated everyone and everything, including his brother. He felt a special need for vengeance against his brother. Enough to the extent that he would destroy multiple worlds for it.

So why did he have a Thor doll? Perhaps there was something deep, deep inside him that still cares. Something that acts like a child, remembering the good times of his childhood.

So Loki has a Thor doll. It looks exactly as he does, with his Asgardian battle robes and a replica of Mjolnir, but the hair is much too exaggerated. It is far too long and shiny. Perhaps that is all the mortals see when they look at him.

And when Loki is settling in to bed that night, wherever that may be, he makes sure the doll is with him. He's not sure what it is, but he feels more secure when the doll is with him. He thinks it's simply some sort of childish urge in him.

And when the God of Mischief sinks into sleep, sometimes with a wicked grin plastered to his face, and the Thor doll has slid to his side and only a hand touching it, Thor's presence is still there. It never left Loki, no matter how much he wants to deny it. Thor will always love his brother, no matter how crazy he may become.

* * *

Thor Odinson has a Loki doll. He can't find one in the place these mortals called a toy store, so he goes to a worker of cloth and buttons and requests that one be made. He gives him a strange look, but once he shows him the card of the Man of Iron's he immediately gets to work. It's amazing how much influence the Metal Man has. The finished doll is actually an amazing piece of work. Thor takes it home and puts it by his bed.

Thor knows what everyone thinks of his brother. Normal mortals will scream in fear when they hear his name. His team will think of him as a psychotic demon of sorts who will tear apart Midgard. And whether or not that is true, Thor hates that the others weren't able to know his brother before he went mad with rage and vengeance. He was quite a pleasant person. Sure, he was quite the clever trickster, and quite mischievous, but he loves his brother more than anything. And even though the whole of Midgard may want to never see his brother again, he does not wish him harmed, or dead.

Thor wishes they could go back to the old days on Asgard, when they were mere children, with simple pleasures. They played together, got in trouble together. Loki actually smiled out of happiness when they were children. He would use his magic to make the day all the more interesting. Thor had no idea Loki wasn't actually his brother. Sure, Loki was a bit...different, but there was nothing pointing to Frost Giant. Thor wishes they could go back. But even though Loki has been trying to rip apart Thor's second home, he will always love his brother.

So Thor has a Loki doll. And like previously stated, it is a well-made doll. The doll looks exactly like his brother. The same robes, in the same color of green, the same greasy black hair, but no helmet or scepter. It is just Loki, before he become vengeful or power-hungry.

So if Thor is awake at night, fearing for Midgard, or missing his brother, he pulls the doll close. It comforts him and reminds him of the good times they had, and makes him feel like everything is alright.

And when Thor falls into a deep, snoring sleep, and the doll is tucked into both his arms, Loki's presence lingers. It is a slightly cold presence, and doesn't watch over the sleeping Thor, but is simply there because it wants to be. It lingers near Thor, because that's what little brothers do. They follow the big brothers.

* * *

Nick Fury has a bazooka. It's brand new and top of the line, and he's very proud of it.

He doesn't trust anyone. In his experience, anyone and everyone could turn and stab you in the back. No one is trustworthy. And even though he's now in a better environment with better people, he still doesn't trust anyone. And in return, no one trusts him. He keeps secrets from even the ones closest to him, therefore removing him from anyone's close trust list. Some Agents like Coulson, Barton, Romanoff, and Hill trust him, but only to an extent. Not to the Barton-Romanoff level of trust, but a safe, business level. No one would ever trust him completely. And he would never trust anyone completely.

So Nick Fury sleeps with a bazooka. He doesn't go a night without doing so. He doesn't feel safe without one. Its presence protects him. You never know when a big-ass bazooka will be useful at an inconvenient time like bedtime.

* * *

So they all have dolls, through which they express their love. They don't tell anyone about their dolls. They're much too protective to do that. But maybe, eventually, they tell each other how they feel. How they feel connected, appreciative, friendship, and in some cases, love.


End file.
